How Do You Sleep At Night?

Verse 1
you think emotion is nothing short of a toy
play until your bored then find some other boy

Hook:
lead me on lead me on
but it's only pretend
lead me on lead me on
but say we're just friends

Pre chorus:
you'd watch me break out in tears
your conscience would still be clear

Chorus
I guess you can live a life telling lies breaking hearts cutting ties
can't say its wrong and who knows if i'm right?
i just don't know how you sleep at night

Verse 2:
You think love is nothing short of a game
loser cleans up the mess and hangs their head in shame

Hook:
lead me on lead me on
just to play dumb
lead me on lead me on
you know I'm under your thumb

Chorus:

Bridge:
you wear your skirts real high
you let your hair down low
you get a little too close
just to catch my eye
lead me on lead me on
but it's only pretend
lead me on lead me on
but say we're just friends

Chrous:

how do you sleep at night?
how do you sleep at night?


just finished writing and playing this song live in t-minus 7 hours

What Makes Ghosts Go Away?

Her words of explanation were only these.

It is for people whom we care nothing about that we demand happiness on any terms: with our friends, our lovers, our children, we are exacting and would rather see them suffer much than be happy in contemptible and estranging modes.
--C.S. Lewis

You see me every now and then. You purposefully look away. How do i get back there? That small window of time where we were happy. That window haunts me. Because something so pure became covered in dirt. What picked me up also hurt. But what's music without dissonance? What's love without heartache? No pain no gain i guess. You can't cook without making a mess.

The good guy will come out on top at the end of the story though, right?... RIGHT???

Regardless, I'm much better now. I hold my own unlike back then. I don't cling. I've got close friends. I'm not afraid to sing. I'm not afraid to bend. And oh how i wish i met you now instead. But would I have grown as much as I did?

Perhaps I'll never know. One day I'll realize.
Though we're alone. It's a blessing in disguise.

Idiosyncratic Reasoning

It all boils down to some chemical reactions exploding in our heads that create feelings and those...those consistently clash with the logic we supposedly have. And there we have it. Cognitive Dissonance. It's all the human knows. So why not live these days by nomadic designs? Why color within manmade lines? Why live in any feeling or thought that's not your own. Why rent a house when you can build a home?

A Boat, Beneath A Sunny Sky

A boat, beneath a sunny sky
Lingering onward dreamily
In an evening of July -

Children three that nestle near,
Eager eye and willing ear,
Pleased a simple tale to hear -

Long has paled that sunny sky:
Echoes fade and memories die:
Autumn frosts have slain July.

Still she haunts me, phantomwise,
Alice moving under skies
Never seen by waking eyes.

Children yet, the tale to hear.
Eager eye and willing ear,
Lovingly shall nestle near.

In a Wonderland they lie,
Dreaming as the days go by,
Dreaming as the summers die:

Ever drifting down the stream -
Lingering in the golden gleam -
Life, what is it but a dream?

-Lewis Carroll

Free Written Stream of Consciousness

once again i watch it melt away like snow. this feeling doesn't exist. It dissolves i watch it decompose. Slowly. Quick. Slowly. And that cycle going moving going. Every river flows. No matter what speed. Flowing flowing. Will we ever enjoy what we see? Will we ever recieve what we need? Flowing Flowing. Holding on to branches along the way. No such thing as being still. It's always going by. Hi. Bye. On the ground. In the sky. Rivers flowing, feelings growing, emotions showing, people coming and going without me ever knowing. The on lookers and spectators arent really paying attention. This river will always be this way. Want, need, dissolve, decay, love, fall apart, desire, hope, intention, invention, rising action, falling action, over and over and over and over and over and over and over flowing. How long before i sink beneath? how long does it take to drown? how long before i need to breathe? How long before i come down? Do answers even matter? it's mad. flowing. flowing. No control. The water enfolds. It's mostly cold. At best. no more no less. Things seem to be. That's all. They are what they are. Why does it bother me? Why do i hope for more? Why are my expectations so high? Coal won't change to diamonds in front of my eyes. Cop out "it takes time, it takes time" Really? Perception is the only changeable. Nothing else. Systems in place and won't erase. Rip these pages. Burn these bridges. Stop. Go. Stop. Go. Write with ink. Shoot the arrow. hit or miss. are there such things? is there anything? flowing flowing. Whether or not your rowing. flowing flowing. Whether or not your rowing.